July 25 2013

This One Time, at Shark Camp...

From private jet drop offs to the burgeoning care package industry, the American tradition of sleep-away camp has evolved quite a bit since we were kids. Sure, you've got your science camps and your music camps and your cooking camps, but then you've also got these:

Camp Ps and Qs

Official Name: Charleston School of Protocol & Etiquette
Duration: Five-days
Location: Charleston, South Carolina

Southern belle Cynthia R. Grosso can mold your unruly tot into the perfect child in less than a week. She brings over 15 years of experience teaching the fine art of table manners, elocution, how to hold your cigarette, etc.


Official Name: Fiji Shark Studies
Duration: 24 days
Location: Fiji!

No metaphor here, this camp allows kids with a passion for marine biology to spend three weeks in Fiji literally swimming with sharks. Campers work alongside conservationists and researchers learning everything there is to know about nature's mightiest fish. (That's gotta be a long three weeks for Mom and Dad, no?)

Nudist Camp

Official Name: Juniper Woods
Duration: Weekend Camp
Location: Catskill, NY

In conjunction with the American Association for Nude Recreation Juniper Woods offers boys and girls a weekend filled with all the traditional summer camp activities – volleyball, swimming, s'more making, song singing – with just one teeny-tiny difference ...

Ted Nugent's Kamp for Kids

Official Name: Kamp for Kids
Length: One day
Where: Nebraska, Iowa, and Colorado

Hey, this is America after all, and we definitely read somewhere that Americans love hunting. Ted Nugent's Kamp for Kids teaches outdoor survival, archery, first aid and bombastic right-wing punditry.

Fantasy Role Playing Camp

Official Name: Camp Carathir
Duration: 5-7 days
Location: Middle Earth a.k.a. Oregon

This one's for the whole family and bills itself as a truly authentic fantasy/role-playing experience. Campers choose a character (practical or mystical) and then decide on a quest. The camp even has its own gold-based economy and tavern. Also, lots of feasting.

Modeling Camp

Official Name: Modeling Camp
Length: Four-days
Location: Seven cities in the US

For just $1,000, girls between the ages of 12 and 18 can test the limits of their self esteem while learning how to pose, walk, sleep with photographers, score drugs, and date older rich men.

Happy camping, kids!

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